Boys watching girl movies

I was watching Breakfast at Tiffany's the other night with some girl friends of mine. We began to discuss the wonder that is Audrey Hepburn (is it possible to avoid that discussion while watching Audrey?) when my friend mentions that she knows a boy with a collection of Audrey Hepburn movies. I'm not saying that all Audrey Hepburn movies are girly, but all of the ones I can name off the top of my head are. My Fair Lady, Sabrina, Roman Holiday, and the afore mentioned Breakfast at Tiffany's are some of the girliest movies I've ever seen. If you are not gay but are a man who owns a collection of girly movies, you are not a man. You are a girl.

Boys with girl hair

Ok so maybe I'm just getting old, but what is UP with boys and the flippy, straightened, slightly long hair with WAY too much product? I saw the Jonas Brothers on a magazine cover in the grocery store and I thought the middle brother's hair looked familiar. Low and behold the pictures above. Boys have started taking hair styling tips from Carol Brady. WTF?

I didn't think this boy was old enough to know who Carol Brady is, but apparently he (or maybe his mom) loves her hair. Maybe there is whole generation of boys whose mothers only know how to style hair like Carol Brady. Maybe those mothers with their limited beautician skills set to work on their sons' hair fearing that the boys would leave the house with bedhead. Maybe. Or maybe boys styling their hair after popular ladies of the 70's are girls.

Boys dancing like girls

I like a man who can dance. I find it endearing. But much like music, there is boy dancing and girl dancing. Boys can do a number of dances which are not inherently girly. However, I have noticed more and more boys throwing caution to the wind and shaking their asses like salt shakers. These were not men doing a salsa routine with a woman, these were boys alone on the dance floor shaking what their mama gave them. Here is a tip boys: swiveling your hips while waving your hands in the air is a girl dance. And it is not even a very good one. If these boys are at the club trying to pick up girls while imitating girly dances I have to ask: are they trying to pick up lesbians? Because, seriously, no self respecting girl will be wooed by a boy who steals her dance moves.

Boys and excessive manscaping

Before I begin, let me make it very clear that not all manscaping is bad. I would argue that more manscaping is better than less, even. However, there is a very fine line. For example, if you are an Olympic swimmer it is acceptable to shave every inch of your body. You have proved your manly endurance in the water and you have earned the right to be as hairless as a 6 year old girl without ridicule from me. If you are not an Olympic swimmer and you are totally hairless, I begin to wonder: ARE you a 6 year old girl?

Please boys, do not take this as the green light to grow Santa beards, let your chest hair grow long enough to be plaited, or quit waxing your back hair. None of those things are acceptable. In fact, I am ok with guys going to the spa to get their back hair waxed. I am even a proponent of it. Anywhere you have hair, I suggest you trim it regularly but shaving your whole body is just unnecessary. For the record, I'm not a fan of facial hair and would always prefer a clean-shaven face on a man. Clean-shaven body on the other hand just makes me think you have yet to hit puberty and could possibly be a girl.

Boys listening to girl music

Some music is made for dancing, some for art, some for rocking out, some to make a statement, some for boys and some for girls. I'm sure there are girls who listen to boy music. Why anyone of any gender would listen to metal is beyond me, but you can't deny that metal is for boys. In the same line of thinking, you can't deny that the Cardigans, Spice Girls, Ani DiFranco and the like is girl music. So, if you are a boy listening to girl music does that make you a girl? On this blog, it sure does.