November 22, 2009

Lady Gaga stealing my dance moves


Celebrity gossip is not usually my thing, but making fun of people totally is so here goes... I was reading a fashion blog that commented on Lady Gaga's Bad Romance video. There was a link to the video on the post, so I watched. There is a lot of crazy in that video but what I was horribly distracted by was the choreography. It looks like they filmed me dancing drunk in my zombie costume on Halloween. This may be the only time I wish I had a video of me dancing because honestly I could sue. Making claw fingers and doing the twist?!?! Those are MY moves. They are not good, but they are MINE. If I had known she was that hard up for choreographers I totally would have signed up for the gig. I have all kinds of bad dances I could hock including the sprinkler, the shopping cart, dice shaking, the angry/sexy chicken (if she does that one I'll start searching my house for cameras) the list goes on and on. Did no one on this video shoot have the nerve to tell Miss Gaga that her dancing sucked? She must have hired professional dancers for this. Did none of the dancers comment on the drunken spastic moves they were being asked to perform? I understand if you can't bring yourself to watch the whole thing, but here is the link. Start watching at 1:21 and you will get the gist by 1:50; there is another brilliant and very accurate example of my drunken zombie dancing at 3:10.

On a separate note, she wears the awesomely insane space hooves that Alexander McQueen presented at NY's Fashion Week at 3:30. I love and want them.

November 07, 2009

Boys are insane


I have come to the conclusion that boys are crazy. All of them, but especially the single ones.

Case in point: A friend of mine went on a dinner date with this guy. They had a lovely meal and got into a taxi to meet up with friends. On the way to the bar (note this is not on the way home from the bar) the guy whips out his wang. There had been no making out, no cuddling, no "excuse me ma'am would you like view my junk?" just cock in a cab. You may be thinking it was drunk penis. Unfortunately he cannot use alcohol as a crutch on this one as they had a bottle of wine between the 2 of them at dinner. I don't think 2 glasses of wine=cock in a cab; crazy does, though.

I was going to write a second example, but the first one really says it all. What sane man pulls out his weiner randomly on a date? Granted, this is just ONE man. And yes, by all means of general consideration he is a man. He is in his 40's, has a career, is not a drug addict. Maybe you would expect that kind of member showing behavior from a 15 year old. But a grown man? The whole thing is disturbing. My point is that it is possible I may have picked a genuinely crazy boy to exemplify this broad generalization, but it is my blog and I generalize if I want to.